“For Every Woman” and “Call Me a Woman” – Part of 1970’s Women’s History

For Every Woman

Nancy R. Smith, copyright 1973

For every woman who is tired of acting weak when she knows she is strong,
there is a man who is tired of appearing strong when he feels vulnerable.

For every woman who is tired of acting dumb,
there is a man who is burdened with the constant expectation of “knowing everything.”

For every woman who is tired of being called “an emotional female,”
there is a man who is denied the right to weep and to be gentle.

For every woman who is called unfeminine when she competes,
there is a man for whom competition is the only way to prove his masculinity.

For every woman who is tired of being a sex object,
there is a man who must worry about his potency.

For every woman who feels “tied down” by her children,
there is a man who is denied the full pleasures of shared parenthood.

For every woman who is denied meaningful employment or equal pay,
there is a man who must bear full financial responsibility for another human being.

For every woman who was not taught the intricacies of an automobile,
there is a man who was not taught the satisfactions of cooking.

For every woman who takes a step toward her own liberation,
there is a man who finds the way to freedom has been made a little easier.

About this poem:
Beginning in 1973 I used the poem when I led women’s consciousness-raising workshops and retreats in Southern New England United Methodist churches. Seven of us founded a conference-level United Methodist Women’s Caucus and continued to use the poem in our work and presentations. This poem found its way around the world by word of mouth as part of the Women’s Movement and the many consciousness-raising groups in existence then. It spread from one women’s group to another, and over the next 10 years, I received at least one request each year from someone who wanted to reprint it. It also appeared in “Dear Abby” in 1988.

“For Every Woman” was of the same timeframe as the beginning of Ms. Magazine, Marilyn French’s The Women’s Room, Marlo Thomas’ Free to Be  album, and Helen Reddy’s hit song “I Am Woman.”

It is important to understand the women’s liberation context of this poem. Later, a Gender Subversion poster for gender questioners/creatives was published by an anarchist group without my knowledge. While I support the cause of the poster, I had no part in that adaptation.

This poem may be reproduced free of charge IF all of the following conditions are met:

• The poem is complete and unchanged.
• The poem is properly attributed:
  Copyright © 1973 Nancy R. Smith.
• The author is notified by postal mail or email as indicated above.

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Call Me a Woman 

Nancy R. Smith, copyright 1976

I am twenty-five And when I am called a girl I speak like a girl:
I flirt and giggle and play dumb.
But when I remember I am a woman,
I put away childish things And speak out, and share, and love.

I am thirty-six And when I am called a girl I think like a girl:
I feel incompetent so I serve and help the men around me.
But when I remember I am a woman,
I put away childish things And work and create and achieve.

I am fifty-two And when I am called a girl I understand like a girl:
I let others protect me from the world.
But when I remember I am a woman,
I put away childish things And decide, and risk, and live my own life.

About this poem:
This poem was also written during the 1970′s Women’s Movement. The last thing a woman wanted to be called was a “girl.” The poem shows how it felt to be called a “girl,” in the 1970s, and I believe this is still true today. (Note that this does not relate to the use of “girl” or “girl friend” by women among themselves.)

Both of these poems were published in Images: Women in Transition, compiled by Janice Grana (Nashville:The Upper Room, 1976)